RAIN ON A SUNNY DAY

That's right, folks! My poetry book has been officially published! I have poems in there dating all the way back to 1997! There is seriously bound to be a poem about you in there, so check it out and BUY ONE! I received my book in the mail yesterday and ran through my house screaming. (I am not at all immature in any way.) Here's the link:

http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/1793170

Sincerely,

Julie (the Poet who knows it)

You can't be "it"...you just can't be.

That’s It? 11/1/10


As much as I don’t want to believe it,
I do.
You just might be all I will ever get.
The manipulation in the silence of these years without you
makes it seem like you never left me.
You still tug at my emotions,
opening a whole new wave that forces the breath out of me at times.
You are still the shadow in my past,
ignoring the fact that I step on your memory every single day.
You still stalk the door of my conscience,
continuing to frighten my future.

At a time,
what seems like eons and eons ago,
I thought you were my destiny.
Fate may have proved that notion false,
but why then am I still stuck,
plastered against the walls of our snippet in time together?
You have managed to push aside our memories,
maybe every so often looking back at them,
but I doubt you study them like I still do.
You came to our conclusion a long time ago-
you just didn’t have the heart to tell me how I could let go.
I am still relentlessly probing our abortive relationship
for no other reason than
frenziedly wishing against you being all I will ever have.

Brakes

Brakes 3/17/10

In meeting you, my turbulent life suddenly went peaceful-
quickly and urgently, I found myself falling silent.
I felt my soul screech to a halt the moment I you snuck up on me.
I thought I was finished,
I thought I was through,
that no one would ever look at me like you did again.
A surprisingly funny valentine
that made me squeamish in my hazy thoughts.
You taught me to feel again,
your eyes told me how to accept the flutters again,
and your subtle actions reminded me that I was there again.
Back in the days when nothing else mattered
but someone else’s recognition that I existed.
Back in the days when I couldn’t help but smile every time I thought of him.
Back in the days that I wouldn’t want to do anything other than spend it with him.


So, excuse me when I say
that your abrupt rejection surprised me more
than your superfluous recognition.
The whole situation is just a bit odd to me.
That you’d follow me around like I was a Goddess
right at the moment I wasn’t looking.
And, yet, quickly turn your own conniving back on me
right at the moment I turned around eager to acknowledge you.

Baffling through this deafening screech of a halt,
I know my poise will be forever perplexed.