You can't be "it"...you just can't be.

That’s It? 11/1/10


As much as I don’t want to believe it,
I do.
You just might be all I will ever get.
The manipulation in the silence of these years without you
makes it seem like you never left me.
You still tug at my emotions,
opening a whole new wave that forces the breath out of me at times.
You are still the shadow in my past,
ignoring the fact that I step on your memory every single day.
You still stalk the door of my conscience,
continuing to frighten my future.

At a time,
what seems like eons and eons ago,
I thought you were my destiny.
Fate may have proved that notion false,
but why then am I still stuck,
plastered against the walls of our snippet in time together?
You have managed to push aside our memories,
maybe every so often looking back at them,
but I doubt you study them like I still do.
You came to our conclusion a long time ago-
you just didn’t have the heart to tell me how I could let go.
I am still relentlessly probing our abortive relationship
for no other reason than
frenziedly wishing against you being all I will ever have.